Ayodele is the youngest of the late Dele Giwa's children, in an exclusive interview with NEXT she tells us what it was like growing up without her father. Here is an exerpt of the interview:
Tell me a little about yourself. When did you leave Nigeria? Were you living in Lagos when your dad died?
Yes, we were in Ikeja, that was where it happened. We were living there, and then after that I moved to my [maternal] grandmother’s, stayed there for ten years. I was in Lagos till I was 15.
How old were you when your dad died?
I was one, going to be two in February [1987]
What was it like growing up into teenage-hood in Lagos as Dele Giwa’s daughter?
I can remember the 10th year anniversary [of his death], they had a really big [event] and I had to speak but other than that I lived a very normal life, unless someone asked me what my last name was. [But] whenever I said [my name] they’d have this look of pity.
I’m sure you’re not very comfortable with that pity; it’s not something you want to have to deal with in any way.
It’s a sad thing, even now. I’m 24 now, [but] I still have that feeling of ‘I wish I had a dad’, because I didn’t grow up with a father. I wish I had that kind of male model, somebody to look up to like a lot of my friends. But my mum has been the best mother and father that I could ask for.
Did you know your dad? Do you have any memories of him?
No, none at all, except for the ones my mum told me, that’s it. Other than that, nothing.
The name Dele Giwa means a lot of different things to people – in journalism, even in terms of style, he was a handsome man with a taste for fine things. What does the name Dele Giwa mean to you?
I think it’s really interesting that people hold him in such high regard. I wish I could understand where they are coming from, but the way people talk about him, especially when I say my last name, they are like “wait – the journalist?” and I say yeah and they are like “wow! I have so much respect for him.” It makes me happy that people see him that way ... it affects me in a good way. It’s pretty interesting just hearing what people have to say about him... I haven’t heard anything negative which is very interesting... I know he wasn’t perfect, but nobody had anything negative to say about him which is very interesting.
Are you ever going to consider doing a book about your dad and what it is to be his daughter?
Well I’ve thought about it. I keep in touch with my [half]-sister – same dad, different mum – and we talk about it all the time. I told her once that I wanted to. In the future, when I’m done with school, I’d really like to write a book, about what happened. Maybe like an investigative kind of book and at the same time trying to talk about what happened and why?
It’s been 23 years since your dad was killed and the killers haven’t been found. How do you feel about this – one of the oldest unsolved murder cases in Nigeria?
It’s sad because it just says so much about Nigeria. A lot of people say they respect him and they think he was an amazing person, [but] nobody is really doing anything to try and get to the bottom of this. If he was such a great person then why don’t you try and at least let people know he didn’t die in vain. The way people are saying ‘I respect him and he was such a great journalist and he was always telling the truth’, ok, if he was telling the truth can you not find out the truth about who murdered him?
Do you think it’d help you in any way if you knew who killed him?
Well [for me] it would mean a lot, because I don’t feel like I’ve got a father, a role model I could have grown up with. But I didn’t. I feel like it’d do a lot for my family, my mum and my dad’s side of the family and my older siblings. I feel like it’d do a lot for them because some of them were there when it happened, so they’d want to know why it happened. I feel like once the truth comes out people will have some kind of peace of mind, without thinking why why why.
Are you in touch with your siblings – your half brothers and sister?
I actually talked to my sister yesterday. [And] I have a blackberry so we talk on blackberry messenger quite often. And then my brother Billy, I keep in touch with him on Facebook, but then Tunde and Dele I don’t know where they are. The last time my mum spoke with them she said that they were in the [United] States. I’m still trying [to find them] but it’s not at the top of my list right now, I know my sister has also tried, whenever I ask she’s like ‘I have no idea.’ Billy was the one who was 19 at the time so he was old enough.
When you talk to him or your sister do you ever talk about your dad?
We haven’t really gone that far. With Billy, when I talk to him it’s more like how are you, how are things. [With] my sister, we haven’t really sat down to talk about him just yet. I have questions to ask her, she wasn’t that old [back then] but she’d definitely remember. I know that I definitely need to talk to her about it, but we haven’t really sat down, and I’ve never really asked what kind of person he was, I mostly get that from my mum, because she has first-hand information.
Where is your mum?
She’s in Nigeria, in Lagos
There are five of you – Dele Giwa’s kids?
Yes
Is any one of you in Nigeria at the moment – living here?
I don’t think so. I think they’re either in London or in the [United] States.
Are you in touch with any of your dad’s associates?
The person who was in the room with him [when the bomb exploded] – that’s Kayode Soyinka, I still keep in touch with him and his family. I talk to his kids, [we] are really close. And whenever I get a chance to travel to England I definitely make it a priority to see them. Ray Ekpu – I just met his son like 2 years ago, for the first time. He’s much older than I am, so he remembered me, and told me “My dad was your dad’s best friend.” I was like “oh, wow, small world.