Familiar tune on a flat note

In Koko Babes, fast money and obsession ruin lives.

Borrowing from the slang popularised by hip pop musician Dbanj, Koko Babes represents Nollywood’s contribution to making the slang even more popular, but unfortunately possesses little else to recommend it. Almost from the outset the film is plagued with pedestrian production values and even worse performances.

The charitable reviewer might call it a meditation on the excesses of three young women, but less forgiving audiences will see it for what it is: exasperatingly substandard film making and a repetitive, predictable story line.

So bad, it’s good

Paradoxically, the film’s faults render it strangely compelling—a car wreck that’s fun to see.

The makers of Koko Babes trudge down a familiar path, their endeavour consistently thwarted by the ludicrously accented Emeka Ike. His performance is guaranteed to provoke either acute irritation or uncontrollable laughter, depending on who’s watching.

Director MacCollins Chidebe obviously hoped the well-known cast would detract from a woeful script -no chance of that though, the plot is largely irrelevant; the film’s moral pulpit falling on its face. Clearly, the crew were anxious to finish this film and move on to the next disaster.

So here goes: Ester (Uche Jumbo), Princess (Uche Elendu), Titi (Adorah Ukoh) and Halima (Queen Nwokoye) are roommates; Ester and Princess routinely use their ‘feminine wiles’ to fleece men of cash, Titi, nicknamed ‘Yahoo Yahoo’, is an internet fraudster extraordinaire.

Then there is sensible Halima, who remains on the straight and narrow with a regular job, but is still jilted by her boyfriend.

Enter superstar musician DJ Koko (Emeka Ike) to further complicate matters - you see, Princess is an avid admirer of his; becoming dangerously jealous when Halima develops a romance with her idol. One must note that Foster (Emeka Enyiocha), who drives a wedge between Princess and Ester, is the film’s sole spark of originality.

Especially bland

Perhaps a fitting subtitle for Koko Babes would be ‘evildoers beware!’ as this is undoubtedly its central concern. However, all the evil must lie in the performances: Emeka Ike for instance is especially bland, his dearth of charisma and risible accent damaging the entire production.

In a story characterised by its idiocy, special mention must be given to the scene in which Ester murders one of her lovers. On her way out, she coolly requests that the hotel receptionist cleans her vacated room - surprise, surprise, the receptionist discovers the body.

Would it be too much for the viewer to assume that a supposed five-star establishment would not allow lobby staff moonlight as domestics?

While luxurious locations in and around Owerri provide a pleasing backdrop, the director goes overboard frequently; the actresses’ suggestive clothing, for instance, reduces them to mere ‘eye candy’. But not even this candy will distract audiences from the lack of a coherent storyline.

Koko Babes is a new film with a stale plot. Save yourself some time. Avoid it.